4:40 p.m. - 2019-12-17
Anyway, for future reference here's a list of why I don't want to be with him anymore.
1) I don't even remember the last holiday that we spent together. He spent Thanksgiving, Halloween, and Fourth of July with his son and I wasn't part of any of those holidays with him. Maybe the last holiday we spent together was Valentines Day? And even then I feel like we didn't see each other on that day, and I can guarantee that anything we did do to celebrate, it was me paying for it, as usual.
There are many, many, many more reasons why he is a fucking terrible person. But I'll save those things for another day when I feel like venting some more.
Today I told him that I was done (yet again), and he throws his normal hissy fit about me being disrespectful because I didn't give him a list of reasons, I just said I was done. I don't feel like I need to provide a list of reasons because you're a piece of shit, and there are too many reasons to even explain to you. And at this point in your life, if you can't figure out what kind of behaviors you're doing that are shitty, then it's too late for you anyway. You can go be someone else's problem. You broke ass worthless piece of shit.
Charleen - quit being stupid and letting this fucking retard back into your life. There are WAYYYYY better men out there that are successful, ambitious, without a crazy ex wife or a dumbass fucking kid, who won't make you PAY FOR EVERYTHING while he wastes his money on other things that are clearly more important to him than you are.
Love yourself and know that you deserve better, and you deserve to be happy with someone who cares about you and SHOWS that they care about you. You don't need someone like Nick that only shows he cares when you're leaving him, because he's not showing you that he cares about you, he's showing you that he cares that you're leaving because he's losing his free ride, and a fucking KICKASS woman that has her shit together, can take on anything, and doesn't need a fucking man for anything. So leave his ass for good, take time to enjoy yourself. Workout, build your business, make new friends, start new hobbies... just get the fuck away from this dude. He is dragging you down to his trailer trash level and you don't belong there.
I love you and you need to stop this pattern of staying with men who have so many fucking problems. I know you are a problem solver and you want to fix things, because that's your natural instinct. But these men are children, and you don't need to be trying to fix them to make them behave properly. You are not their mother and it's not your job to teach a man how to be a fucking man. If he hasn't figured it out by now... he's not gonna. So save yourself some sanity and well-being and just stay single until someone truly knocks your socks off. Until then, don't waste your time with fuckboys who are worthless and just want your time because you are a caring, loving, sweet, and giving person. Just because someone wants you, doesn't mean they DESERVE you. And Nick definitely does not DESERVE YOU. Not in a fucking million years honey.
Build your lady network, engage with your family more, find rewarding work... when all of this in your life is aligned, you won't even miss being in a relationship. Especially not one like this.
This is for your health, your mental well being, and your sanity. Not to mention he's a huge time suck and most of that time is just you feeling disappointed or upset. Love yourself enough to know that this is the best path for you. It's tempting to go back to the things we know because it's comfortable, but you don't need this drama. You don't need to be supporting a man child while he wastes his money on stupid shit. You don't need someone who doesn't care about you, he just enjoys the things you do for him and how you make him feel. He doesn't give two shits about you, or how you feel.
You will find someone that will love everything about you someday. You'll find someone that would do anything to make sure you feel loved always. You'll find someone as giving and caring as you, who will ask you how your day was, and will remember your birthday and anniversary. You'll find someone that tells you that you're beautiful on a regular basis, and will show you off to other people instead of pretending you don't even exist.
You deserve SO MUCH MORE THAN WHATEVER THE FUCK THIS IS, because it is NOT a relationship honey. He is using you to make himself feel better, and that's all that matters to him. So leave, and never look back. You will find someone better in no time... I promise.